October 18th, 2010

WHY HALLOWEEN MATTERS

Halloween in 2010 falls on a Sunday night and across America, for a variety of reasons, movements are afoot to move trick-or-treating away from Sunday and to Saturday evening.

In New Orleans, there is a Saints football game on Sunday night that will detract and distract from the frivolity of an evening of costumes and candy collecting; in New England there is a Patriots day game that somehow will do the same thing. In Florida, religious groups are outraged that a “Pagan” holiday like Halloween is going to be celebrated on the most holy of days, (Sunday), and across America there are pathetic cries of sympathy for the children of America having to bear the burden of beginning a school week the day after an evening of home invasions in the name of candy collection.

http://www.nola.com/saints/index.ssf/2010/10/hould_trick-or-treating_be_mov.html

http://www.necn.com/10/03/10/bNew-England-bFoxboro-town-officials-tel
/landing.html?blockID=323904&feedID=4206

http://www.tennessean.com/article/DA/20101014/OPINION03/10140302/
LETTER++Trick+or+treat+should+be+changed+to+Saturday

http://www2.wsls.com/news/2010/oct/13/covington-changes-halloween-trick-or-treating-satu-ar-560505/

So why does something so seemingly benign and innocent and un-important as when kids trick-or-treat on Halloween really matter? Were there only one or two reasons it would be easy to explain; the fact that there are too many reasons to count answers the question itself.

In an age where people have only two arguing techniques, dismissal of the subject and personal attacks, it gets more and more difficult to have intelligent debate and conversation. On the issue of Halloween being celebrated on October 31st and ONLY on October 31st, anyone who argues in favor of not changing the date is either confronted by waves of the hand and the always popular phrase “whatever,” or are attacked personally as being “mean,” or “over-thinking.” Neither could be further from the truth, and anyone who ever answers a logical, reasoned argument with the phrase “whatever” has already raised the white flag of surrender and should be discarded out of hand.

In researching this mind numbing story, multiple concerns became abundantly clear: 

The overwhelming majority of Americans oppose any such movement of Halloween. Once again, the vocal majority of pussified losers in America is affecting change while the vast majority of our nation watches it be ripped away from them even further.  http://articles.mcall.com/2010-10-13/features/mc-parents-trickortreat-20101013_1_trick-mischief-night-halloween

People, most notably children, need to learn that the world does not revolve around them. If you don’t like an event, don’t attend or participate. Stop trying to demand that the world change for you. 

Other people matter as much as you do. Plenty of folks already have plans on Saturday night October 30th and they neither want to nor will stay home to hand out candy to children just because you ask them to. Be considerate of other people and learn to live with disappointment.

Intentions are meaningless; results matter. Many groups in NFL cities are arguing that trick-or-treating on Sunday night will be far more dangerous because in most communities, night will fall as millions of drunks are driving home from football games. Therefore, the solution is to move trick-or-treating to Saturday night, when apparently, contrary to all evidence to the contrary, there are no drunks on the road. Let that one swim around in your head for a moment and stand back in awe of the abject stupidity of it.  

Life is not fair. Choices come with consequences. If you choose to be a part of Halloween in America the you choose the consequence of, 5 times out of every 7 years, going out on a weeknight and adjusting to the ramifications of that choice and those consequences; including, but not limited to the following: an earlier end to trick-or-treating than may occur on a weekend, a tired family the next day, and an inability to watch football. For Christ’s sake.

Calendars matter. If we are to move Halloween to make the lives of parents, families, teachers and children easier than why don’t we simply decree that all calendars and dates are meaningless? From this date forward, let us simply move Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, Christmas, and my personal favorite, the 4th of July, to the nearest weekend evening? Why celebrate dates as though they have any significance  whatsoever? In fact, I decree that everyone’s birthdate is now irrelevant and all birthday celebrations will be held on Friday and Saturday nights only.

In today’s society, everything matters. Asinine, inane arguing points like “what’s the big deal,” and “what’s the harm,” and “it’s only Halloween,” have been used for decades to chip away at our culture under the guise of “protecting the children.” This is why Halloween must stay on October 31st. When everyone began receiving trophies and we stopped keeping scores at youth sporting events we were told “it’s just a game.” When we began using new math in schools across America in the 1990s and allowing children to say that two plus two equals five we were told “they’re just kids, they’ll grow out of it, it’s more important to protect their feelings.” When we stopped grading and failing children we were told to “relax, there’s more to life than grades.” 

All of these things have happened, are happening and they all matter. The rules and restrictions of life matter. Allowing our culture and our children to feel otherwise is what has created our arrogant, selfish, entitled society that so many of us hate. Yet we continue to allow foolish people with no purpose on earth other than to falsely make people feel good to run our lives. Come to my house on October 30th and the only treat you’ll get is a snarling German Shepherd.